The Sorry Cake. I couldn't resist the outrageously cheap bananas, so banana and walnut it was.
This is the cake 12 hours and 2 people later. Cake, good, mmmm.
My attempts at healthiness. Roasted capsicum, zuchinni and feta salad.
Of course no health kick is complete without blueberry pancakes. It's fruit and it's fresh, and it's oh so delicious.
Cuban black beans with brown rice, salsa and yoghurt. Mucho yumbo!
It seems my life is all about the cliches lately. I guess I'd forgotten that when it comes to this crazy game called life, one should always expect the unexpected.
This week, out of the blue (actually not really but it felt that way) things have gone a bit awry. And during the thick of things the shoulder to cry on came from the most unlikely of sources.
Things are pretty sorted now, but what can you do when you've really let down the person you love the most? Bake them a cake? That kinda doesn't cut it.
I know I've been getting complacent with life and this relationship, not appreciating how lucky I am. I haven't stood up for what and who I believe in because I've been scared and it's easier to run away.
I think the only way to make things right is to try and and be a better person. And maybe a cake will help a little. Banana and walnut perhaps... or chocolate?
Things that I can't get enough of lately:
- Korean food (especially Bibimbab, yum!)
- Sleep
- Blogs
- Tiny knick-knacks
- Nectarines from Jayme's tree
- Sunshine (back into the sunbaking groove after many summers indoors)
- Shopping for office furniture (strange yet true)
- Regina Spektor
- Rice milk (light, sweet and oh so lovely)
- Marat Safin (double yum!)
- My new $5 jeans and $1 brown belt
- Writing lists
I have a friend who is kind of new. By that I mean we've been friends
only for about 6 months. I really like this friend and we get along
quite well, and I'm sure we would get along even better if only I could
understand what the hell she was saying half the damn time!! Not only
is this person a soft talker, but she is also a fast talker. Fast and
soft. Soft and fast. All the time. I get pretty sick of repeating myself
(What was that? Sorry what?) and so often I don't bother and just end up
making non-committal noises (yeah, mmm mmm) without even knowing what was said.
Now obviously I have two options here. I can continue the way it's been,
not say anything to her, and watch as our friendship sort of drifts along
and probably peters out somewhere down the track. Or I can gently and
tactfully raise the issue with her in the hopes that her condition then
improves and we might become closer friends because of it. I know this is
the decent thing to do, but the question is how.
Do I casually drop it in the conversation, like 'Yes, I love carrot cake too.
Hey, has anyone ever told you you talk very soft and fast?'
Or perhaps after a serious of whats from me, I could say 'Sorry about this.
I'm not sure if it's my hearing, but I always seem to have trouble trying to understand you. Isn't that funny?'
To which she would either get highly offended, or say 'Oh don't worry, that's
just me - I'm a notoriously fast and soft talker!'
To which I would reply 'Well will you please do something about it!'
Spending time reading masses of blogs lately has led me to ponder on this little 'ol here tea time. You see I'm not sure exactly what kind of weblog it is, or more precisely what kind I want it to be. So far it's sort of a 'blah blah this is the shit in my life' diary type, which would be okay if I was witty and entertaining like mimi or even momo. Or if I wrote beautifully and poetically like shari or tuckova. But alas. There's also no chance this blog will ever have an interesting focus such as politics or music or the wankers of the world.
So it is what it is - a vent for all the crap that flies around in my brain, overcrowding the interesting thoughts that I know are crammed down the back somewhere. Hopefully once I get all the crappy thoughts out, the good stuff will have room to breathe and develop and take form in some thoughtful posts about ideas and issues and the like.
Until then, it's a constant battle to not cross the line of too much information, which I have a tendency to do. Like I was going to post about throwing up my dinner the other night, beacause it was sausauges and was like throwing up tinned cat food. But that is seriously gross and obviously way too much information, so I will spare you dear internet. But next time, maybe not.
Yesterday at the pool I passed a mum and her two young kids buying stuff at the canteen.
Mum (to her son): Because girls always come before boys.
Son (passionately while stamping his foot): No they don't!
Mum: Laughs wickedly.
I can't wait to mercilessly tease my children.
Yay something to cheer me up - I've been tagged!
As I'm not going to cheat on this, I should warn you that our itunes library contains a lot of random music that is used for our various video productions, such as kids birthdays, weddings and films about UFOs. But as long as a track has a title, then I'll use it.
1. How does the world see you?
Right out of your hand - Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds
The world eating out of my hand? I wish.
2. Will I have a happy life?
Zulu - Miriam Makeba
I wish I knew what this song is about (other than the Zulu people). But it sounds happy!
3. What do my friends really think of me?
Soft Mistake - Lamb
Oh.. a mistake. But at least I'm a soft one.
4. Do people secretly lust after me?
Hold U - Master Ace & Jean Grae
I think that's a yes.
5. How can I make myself happy?
Nigahen kyon - Lata Mangeshkar
Doh! Anyone speak Hindi?
6. What should I do with my life?
Hearts and Flowers - Lamb
It's decided. I'm to be a hippy!
7. Will I ever have children?
I wanna sex U up - Color Me Badd
I guess so, after all that sex!
8. What is some good advice for me?
Heartbeats - Jose Gonzalez
I should follow my heart, indeed.
10. How will I be remembered?
The View - Modest Mouse
Uhm, okay. My visionary view of the world, perhaps?
11. What is my signature song?
Do You Love Me - The Blues Brothers
Insecure and trying to impress. But fun!
12. What do I think my current theme song is?
Unchained Melody - The Righteous Brothers
I'm stuck in the past.
13. What does everyone else think my current theme song is?
Runaway - Ovorigin
Oh dear.
14. What song will play at my funeral?
Shame - PJ Harvey
I hope that's doesn't mean I'm going to die young.
15. What type of women do I like?
What'cha Know About - Donavan Frankenreiter
Obnoxious know-it-alls, just like me!
16. What type of men do I like?
Neuro-transmitter - Ovorigin
Ones that stimulate my mind, definitely.
17. What is my day going to be like?
Mast Qalander - Massive Attack and Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan
I will be worshipping God.
I know that I resemble my parents a lot more than I would like to
admit. This is not all bad as my parents are generally nice
people. Also it's totally understandable seeing as I did live with
them for 21 years of my life and now see them regularly. Parents and
family play such a big role in shaping our psyche and personality,
even though it's often nicer to think I shaped myself and my identity
through my own experiences and life choices. I think It's probably a
mix of both.
Anyway, recently I've been particularly disturbed by the fact that my
parents are such terrible communicators. They overreact, they get uptight,
they get defensive, they get frustrated - basically they're a communication
disaster!
But what's worse is that I know, dammit I know that I am just as bad!
I get like that with them and with Muz, especially when I'm tired and/or in
a bad mood. But sometimes I just do it and I don't know why, it's like
bad habit I can't shake. It's horrible because I know I'm doing it
and I hate it but I can't seem to stop.
I think it's just going to take a lot of will power, persistence and maybe
praying to the God of Kicking Bad Habits.
Despite the fact that I was a (semi) vegetarian for 5 years, I'm not particularly squemish about handling raw meats. In fact, I kind of like the feel of raw meat, though that's not to say I have some kind of raw meat fetish, ala Amy Winehouse (check out the segment after the music vid, though that's worth watching too) (Hey, that was my 1st ever youtube link!)
That being said, gutting and cleaning a whole squid definitely ranks high on my disgustometer. So what did I do last night? You guessed it. I wish I had a photo of the squid before I got stuck into it, but it looked pretty much like these guys:
So anyway I probably should have googled instructions on how to clean a squid, but instead I just kind of chopped off the front tentacles and its big googly-eyed head (which was very freaky). Then all its ink started pouring out, so I had to rinse that out during which I splashed some on my new top from Thailand.
Then I tried to get all its gooey guts out, but couldn't, so I had to cut it open and scrape the shit out, and then I was upset because it wasn't in tube form anymore and I couldn't cut it into proper calamari rings. Lastly I took out it's spine thingy, and pulled off its stretchy black spotted skin and threw all that stuff out (which made our bin stink today).
Then I cut off the side flaps and chopped them, along with the tentacles and body, into smaller pieces. I coated the pieces with salted flour and fried them in olive oil, which I put on top of a salad, tentacles and all. But I think I under-cooked them, cos they were all kinda soft and mushy, so then Muz wouldn't eat it and I didn't like it much. I ate a bit, couldn't finish it, so then it all went into the bin.
Poor squid. It died in vain, really. I hope it's other dead squid friends from Angelikas Brothers went to more skilled kitchens to be handled by more skilled squid cooks than I.
These xmas/new year holidays have been so relaxing I fear that returning to work may cause my body and brain to go into a state of intense shock as I curl up in childs pose on the floor of my office for several hours, or something like that.
Not having to feel gross and seedy recovering from a trashy drug/alchohol fueled New Year's Eve for the first time in about 10 years has probably helped. Instead, I have:
Slept up to 10 hours most nights.
Munched on endless bowls of date and chocolate gluten free biscuits and icecream (together, topped with berries yum yum).
Managed to convince Muz to go down to the beach with me.
Been to see three (3!) films at the cinemas. I think I saw that many in the whole of 2006. The best by far: Little Miss Sunshine. Haven't laughed that much in a movie in so long. It was sad and funny and the characters were brilliant.
Sadly dissapointed by Volver. After reading tonnes of rave reviews, I had high expectations, but it doesn't compare with Almodovar's best (eg All About My Mother, Bad Education).
Cooked up lunches like this one:
Sunbaked and read this book which I'm still reading. It's an interestingly constructed narrative that gives good insight into life in the Ottoman empire, but a bit too violent in parts for my liking. Not really into scenes where people are getting their head smashed in by a metal inkpot.
Discovered the best summer drink ever: Iced organic white tea.
I found this tea at Coles (of all places).
All you do is make one or two strong cups of the tea (normal green tea is also good), pour into a large jug (polka-dotted of course). Fill the jug up with filtered water and put in the fridge. Serve chilled with some mint and you have the most refreshing and deliciously thirst-quenching liquid in the world.
Oh, and I forgot to mention spending time down at Middleton, were I went on lots of beautiful coastal walks, had a drink at the local pub, ate the best fish and chips on the beach, and got my arse royally kicked in Scrabble. Damn, gotta get more tactical with the Scrabble!
